Obituary of Helen Jane DOUGAN

DOUGAN, Helen (nee Fielder) Aug 18, 1944 – Feb 25, 2013 On the day she chose to go Helen had visits from both her oldest and her youngest brothers. She would have taken great comfort in that. The importance of those symbolic parentheses are testament to Helen’s love for her family. Because Helen had no children of her own, she and Harv, her husband of almost 50 years, embraced two very special little girls, Kelli and Nicki, symbolically adopting them as their own many decades ago. Although they never had a pet of their own, rarely a day went by that wouldn’t see either Harv or Helen tossing the ball, petting or just speaking quietly through the fence to their next door neighbour’s dogs, effectively becoming surrogate owners. For most of her life spent in Strathmore, Helen had no sisters close by. So, in a pattern that was to characterize her life, she symbolically adopted Barb as her sister and very best friend. Over their several decades of travelling together, attending church together, of garage-saling and gardening, their bond of friendship and sisterhood only strengthened. You couldn’t run through the long list of Helen’s brothers and sisters – Don, Jack, Pat, Keith, Ted, Beth, Judi, (Helen), Leigh, Bob and Verne without including Barb amongst them. The light of Helen’s blessed and happy, but all too short life was her husband and teenage sweetheart Harv, who passed away far too soon just over a year ago, leaving her with a heart that never fully healed spiritually, emotionally or physically. It would do her memory a disservice were no mention made of her other love; shopping. Goodness, could she shop! No garage sale ever saw Helen walk away empty handed. There wasn’t a Sears store within driving distance that didn’t have at least one clerk who knew Helen, if not by name, then assuredly by sight. Her love of all children was paralleled and expressed by her love of buying gifts for children. Never to be caught unprepared, she kept a constant lookout for, and the shelves of her spare room stocked full of, stuffed animals, outfits, toys, books and gifts for babies and children, some awaiting a birthday and others, as yet unborn. Helen kept a stockpile of comic and funny Mother’s and Father’s Day, birthday, anniversary, Hallowe’en and Christmas cards against the day when a friend, relative or loved one was either celebrating or recuperating. The modern day advent of talking and musical cards delighted her to no end, and she had no compunction spending as much time and money picking out just the right card as she did picking out just the right gift. She loved to laugh but enjoyed so much more making others laugh. If it is possible to sum up a life in a single word, then that word for Helen would be ‘others’. She placed herself in front of, or above, no one. She lived to complement, not dominate the needs and wants of others. She saw and lovingly embraced her role as helpmate to Harv. There was never a reunion, a birthday party, a church supper nor a work-bee that couldn’t depend upon Helen’s fun filled spirit to lighten the work load. She volunteered at her church, with the Strathmore Women’s Shelter and Harv’s Car Club. She was as willing to help paint a goat shed as she was to bake one of her amazing carrot cakes for a church sale or sibling’s birthday party. She knitted scarves, toques and mitts for the homeless. And she was oh so faithful in visiting any relative, friend or acquaintance confined to bed. Helen’s was truly a life defined by helping, caring and love of others and there is perhaps, no greater epitaph to which any of us could aspire. If you count yourself amongst those who cared for Helen, please do feel at liberty to wear your most comfortable jeans and attend her joy filled memorial service, to be held on Saturday, May 25, 2013 at Strathmore Alliance Church (325 First Ave.) at 1:00 p.m. Helen supported The Mustard Seed ministry in Calgary for many years and would have taken comfort knowing others like you had chosen to continue her support by giving a donation in her memory. Donations may be made directly to The Mustard Seed (102 – 11 Ave SE, Calgary, AB T2G 0X5). To send condolences, please visit www.wheatlandfuneralhome.ca. Send Condolences